Death Traps & Bubble Wrap

Max is going to become mobile in no time. He is a VERY busy baby. He does NOT sit still and hasn't from day one. Even when he was brand new, he was a wiggle worm. He kicked and flailed his arms constantly and started raising his head off of me at 2 days old. The only time he is still is when he's sleeping, and even then, he's a wild sleeper. So it's pretty obvious that he will be into anything and everything! He has become a pro at rolling from back to belly, propping himself up on his hands and knees, and scooting himself a few feet backwards. I know it is only a matter of time before he figures out how to go forward- aka. CRAWLING--yikes! Since he has figured out this new trick, I have begun to contemplate baby proofing this house. Ha! House? More like death trap.

1. Tower of Terror- We have 2 flights of stairs. Luckily, a closed door blocks the stairs to the basement. The other set are BRUTAL. 20 very steep hardwood stairs bridge the living room to the bedrooms and bathroom. 2 gates are mandatory, but I can just picture my little maniac climbing over said gates and tumbling down the stair mountain. Or attempting to scale them from the outside railing. I have anxiety just thinking about it.
2. Strangulation and/or Electrocution Apparatus- There is no way to get around all of the wires that run from the tv, xbox, cable box, router, printer, etc. I have strategically placed the computer desk next to the tv stand so that the wires are secluded to the one corner of the living room. That being said, the pile of wires lay there taunting me daily. First of all, I hate the tackiness of wires. Second of all, they are just BEGGING for little hands to pull on them, chew on them, try to wear them as a necklace, and so on. I'm not sure how to go about hiding them... too bad I can't fashion some sort of gate to block those. Hmm... interesting thought...
3. Hot Water Black Hole- Our house is an old historic building. The heating system is old school. The vents are not your typical flat to the ground vents with the slots that let air in and out. Our vents are these large metal-ish panels that run along the base board of every room and stick out of the wall a couple of inches. They don't get scolding hot, but they definitely get warm from the 180 degree water that is flowing through them. I am picturing my little Max sticking his tiny hands down in the slot of the vent and getting stuck. Or shoving little toys inside. Or food. Or what if one of those things just up and exploded 180 degree water everywhere? Who built this place? They obviously weren't thinking about children. I can do things about stairs and wires. I can't do anything about the vents. Bah! Panic attack.

Too bad I can't just barricade Max in a little room made of pillows and bubble wrap and let him go to town. Although, I'm sure he'd figure out some way to get a black eye or bust his lip open regardless of his surroundings. But still... another interesting thought....