Bodily Fluids

Merry Christmas Eve! Today has been a great day at our house. Max was only up once in the night and slept until 9 a.m., husband is off work... we have been relaxing and eating and watching football (NOT my choice but when husband has the potential to win $$ from fantasy football, I'll deal with it. And only complain a little.) I even took a nap with my little man while husband watched football. YES, WE BOTH TOOK A NAP. That makes for a great day in and of itself! Max drank a bottle and we were spooning on the couch and we both went to sleep. It was great. Until I woke up 45 minutes later, having drooled on Max's head (oops) and noticed an awful pain in my arm. Remember, "little" man weighs almost 20 lbs and was KILLING my arm. I would rather amputate my arm than wake him from his nap so I quickly had to make a decision. Do I continue to deal with the pain and let him sleep or do I move my arm which is SURE to wake him? Ow, ow, ow. Ok, he's gotta go. I whisper for husband to come take him AND HURRY. He still sleeps. We lay him in the living room pack n play. He still sleeps. WHAT?! Yes! Merry Christmas to me! He continued to sleep for another 45 minutes and then I heard him jabbering to himself so I went to get him.

One of my favorite moments is when I pop my head over the edge of the pack n play and he sees me. Immediate smile from ear to ear and I squeal a "hi, ____!" (fill in the blank with whatever made up name I've come up with that day) He is so happy when he first wakes up! I grab him, squeeze him, give him about 15 kisses, change his diaper, feed him a bottle, and then it's play time! Max loves to play. He's sitting on my belly and I have both of his hands and we're bouncing and being silly and I go to kiss him... and that's when it happens. There was no sound. No warning. I just felt it. And smelled it. And.... tasted it? OMG. Yep, that just happened. He puked on my mouth and down my shirt. GAG GAG GAG. Any sort of spit up is disgusting. Formula spit up is rancid. It is way worse than when he was breastfeeding. That awful sour milk smell... and it's stringy... and... it's on my mouth. OMG. EW EW EWWWWW. I lay him down and grab the burp cloth to clean myself off. SICK. I am fighting back the urge to vomit myself. YUCK YUCK YUCK. That SMELL! UGH!

Now, worse bodily fluids have been on me. At the beginning, he would projectile poo all over the place. All over the changing table, the floor, and even me. I can't count the number of times that he has peed on me. But nothing worse has been in my mouth than spit up. Gross. I would rather drink his pee. Not kidding. Spit up smells and it stains and it's just all around nasty. And it was in my mouth. Merry Christmas to me.